Are you in any kind of relationship that is draining your energy because you are 'giving' too much? Do you feel an obligation to step in and make things better for another?
Because empaths are of the Light and want to Serve in a divine manner, often we attract familial or love relationships in which we are the caregivers, and this can lead to the promotion of co-dependent behaviors that we may have learned early in life.
Here’s a tip for relationships of any kind: learn to see beyond the immediate pain or presentation of the other person. Know that whomever might be suffering is a spiritual being who has their own path to walk. Sometimes when we step in to solve another's problems, we prevent that person from having their own spiritual experiences. Don’t get pulled in and take on another’s problems as if they were your own.
If you do, you might wind up with what we call 'compassion fatigue.' And that can lead to adrenal fatigue, exhaustion, and even illness.
What if in the act of attempting to help or rescue or fix someone else, you actually were preventing that person from learning their own soul lessons? Perhaps it's time to allow your loved ones, friends, children, partner, or parents to grow and evolve through solving their own problems. This can be difficult for empaths because perhaps we want to help so badly, and then if we don't, sometimes we may experience guilt.
Feeling guilt, one of the core 'soul wounds' of empaths, usually stems from childhood experiences in which we were judged for not living up to some ideal standard. Guilt usually has the energy of self judgment behind it, and the message is 'I didn't fulfill an expectation' or 'I didn't do something correctly.'
How would it feel if you could liberate yourself from that pattern and basically say "it's none of my business what other people expect of me?"
One of my clients, Sara, had a pattern of attracting partners in her life that needed to be taken care of. The men with whom she found herself attracted were needy and Sara would all too willingly step in to ‘rescue’ them.
When Sara became empowered, she was able to better set firm energetic, emotional, and mental boundaries with her loved ones. She learned that sometimes, disengaging (rather than engaging) from interactions in relationships can be exactly what is being asked for to maintain healthy balance.
You too can do this, just keep learning and growing, taking good care of yourself! It's time to put yourself FIRST! Yes, it's now time to embrace being 'selfish' as a good thing and a part of your development as a healthy, empowered empath.
Are you willing to do it? Your energetic and emotional sanity depend on it.
For some of the best self care strategies for empaths, engage with the 8 hours of audio and eBooks in the Complete Empath Toolkit.